electricity gives and electricity takes,
i think there has been a severance
between hand and mind,
a crack just wide enough for lost words to
slip through
like sand in an hourglass
of lost time i will never make up for.
my friends see it too
and relief is so quick
to become grief when you realize
that the loss is as real and gaping and vacant
as you feared it was.
as a child i took pride
in the way i could carry words
with me, own them
permanently
so that no one could take them away.
i always imagined
i’d go to my grave with
words cradled in my arms,
threaded through my hair like wildflowers.
but memory gives and memory takes
what it is owed
and electricity comes with a price,
one that i am still paying.
some days
my memories feel as slippery
as the dreams i have at night
that i can’t remember in the morning.
the lost words,
they don’t belong to me anymore,
i cannot carry them in my head
the way i did for so long,
instead i write them down in a little book,
each page a graveyard.
i can only hold onto sounds now
not letters or meaning making,
no complexities,
just simple sounds,
phonemes, allophones.
i find i’ve written conviction
instead of condition,
assign when i meant define,
breeze instead of breathe,
because i can only hold onto sounds now,
echoes ringing in my ears.
i’m afraid that i will never live up to
the potential i once had.
electricity gives and electricity takes
eighteen little seizures
and sometimes my limbs still jerk
of their own accord,
as if they too are not mine anymore,
a side effect
i was promised would be temporary.
there are drawings in my sketchbook
that i don’t remember drawing,
months and years of time and memory gone,
but out of everything i’ve lost
it’s the words i miss most.
they used to live
in my ribcage
in my skull,
in the palm of my hand.
now they are just visitors,
tourists,
ghosts,
so fleeting
as if they never really belonged to me at all.
I like how the author captured the feeling of losing something central to who you are, words, memories, and identity. It interested me how they described language slipping away and turning sounds into echos. It was a beautiful way to to reflect memory and how it defines us.
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I like how Rosenberg effectively expresses his vulnerability and emotions, allowing me to connect with and relate to there writing. Rosenberg conveys the feeling of losing something essential to one’s identity and the difficulty of being unable to regain it. Rosenberg’s choice of words is smooth and beautiful, which enhances the poem and makes it transformative.
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I feel like Duly focused on fleeting memories of people. Memories of people that have dissolved like salt in water. It is something that I personally could relate to as it is quite easy to get distracted with life and what is in front of you and lose track of what once was and that it was also once yours. I believe it has an almost existential overtone to it as well? But I’m not sure. Now, the memories that used to invoke strong emotions feel more like stories you once experienced and perhaps even not as “real”. Now I live a very different life with very different people and I’m like a goldfish, forgetting people whom I haven’t seen them in a while, being consumed by whatever is in front of me.
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I found this poem to be so incredibly devastating in the absolute best way possible. I’m not exactly sure if this is the right interpretation, but this is exactly what it feels like to age and realize that aspects of your life, which were once so integral, are just memories that become harder to remember as the days go on. The line “there are drawings in my sketchbook that I don’t remember drawing” speaks to me in a way that makes me truly feel this cruel dynamic between age and memory. It’s such a grossly complicated feeling to reflect on moments in your life that felt so big and important and realize you barely even remember being there. This can also be interpreted as someone having undergone something physically traumatic that now prevents them from doing the activities they once loved as well as they used to, for instance the line “I think there has been a severance behind hand and mind” which, to me, seems almost like someone dealing with a traumatic brain injury that now makes them feel as though they’ve lost aspects of their life that made them feel whole. Whatever it is, I found this poem so insanely emotional, and I absolutely adored the beautiful visual language within it.
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Hey Duly! I really enjoyed your poem. It caused me to reflect on memory and the feeling of grief of losing parts of yourself over time. You describe memory as something slippery and fading which made me think about how fragile our grasp of language is, especially as we start to get older. Your words and ideas made me feel a mix of emotions. I felt amazed when you were able to look back on your past self, particularly the child who ¨carried words¨ like they were treasures. But I also felt a sense of loss when you described mourning for something so essential but intangible. You were able to write about your love for words and your inability to access them now so beautifully. One line that stood out to me was ¨each page a graveyard.¨ I find this metaphor very powerful. You could’ve used notebook instead of graveyard or memory instead of page but by deliberately choosing these words you gave the audience a more haunting and sacred feel. The tone throughout the piece is sorrowful and intimate. Overall, I enjoyed reading your work!
– Brooke
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