I’d like to think that it opens up a realm of possibilities.

I was told that I have a soothing voice for ASMR, the kind that puts people to sleep. That my love of baking and reading should be combined to make a bookstore with a cafe that features the sweetest of treats.

Though I don’t think I could ever be a poet, the way I fall back on rhymes and sound derivative without contributing to a much larger conversation. Because I’m still conversing with my inner self and trying to decide where my loyalties lie.

I thought I had my mind set, especially when I wrote my whole thesis on how physicians can read fiction to improve their empathy, and I imagined that I’d be that one medical student who would put in the time and effort to continuously read.

Except it’s still hard to picture myself wearing scrubs to work every day, or one day standing up in a white coat ceremony. Conversely, I can’t imagine myself spending hour after hour, day after day, with my face glued to a computer screen, trying to create fantastical stories.

I’m envious of the younger, far more idealistic Raisa, who planned her life out accordingly, who would major in Chemistry (and only Chemistry), who would continue the illustrious line of doctors and medical professionals in the Santos family.

If only it were that easy.

But if lives were likened to movies, mine would still be at the very beginning, and the camera has yet to pan out over the rest of my story. It’s about to enter the scene, the one that takes place in a few weeks, where I spend three hours in the early part of the day, wearing a graduation cap and gown, and for once, making both of my parents proud.

And then what comes next? A novel to finish, a brigade to attend, and a few more opportunities to spend time with both long lasting and newfound friends. I suppose, even, there’s a chance to reflect.

It may be trite, but maybe in time, I’ll find my own road less traveled by.

-Raisa Alexis Santos